military training

first time training in a military academy, musings from that period….. (with a hint of optimism and grit of a soldier!)

“i’m breathing in this life..

feeling the high being alive.

paddling my way through soft winds

it’s a strength bestowed by the djinns.

yes, here i am in truest sense..

momentous threshold to the days in defence!

‘one-for-all, all-for-one..

have pulled up socks and intended the pun.

challenging limits, breaking barriers to endurance..

i’ve discovered myself in newer abundance!

the resistless soldier undergoing training,

the parade, the discipline, the officer-like bearing!

in pristinity of pursuit, the focus firmly sits

this is all the glamour and the glitz.

letters from home- uplift, bring unfathomable joy..

mother, father.. I will be the guardian of our sky!” 

 

tribe affinity!

i, like everyone else have a natural inclination towards all the ‘groups’/ ‘clubs’ / ‘teams’ that i’ve been part of as a student in my school or college days. here’s one jingle i made for our Squadron- CHITNIS at the Air Force Academy! such cheering was a common sight during competitions ranging from swimming to athletics to cross country! they were significant in motivating the youngsters and inspiring the team spirit! #leadership lesson!

CHITNIS

CHEEEEEEETAHHHHHHHHHSSSS!!!!!!!!

“Cheetahs are we ! champions of academy!

synonymous with finesse! say ‘Yellow’ for Chitnis!!”

though this never got rooted twas a lil sophisticated perhaps for all the intense scenarios that needed jeering!

TODAY

it requires mettle to get things done NOW and not ‘someday’. there’s grit and determination that make one a go getter. heard of the adage- now or never.. seize the moment.. ?! my instructor at the Military academy used to say- tomorrow is a fine day, but it never comes. and just so elusive is that ‘someday’.
i heard somewhere- when you’re down and out just get up, dress up AND show up! the essence of it all is in ACTION.. prompt action.
my experience of 22 years or rather since the time I’ve come to mature senses has laid bare one weakness that affects people in more ways than one-… PROCRASTINATION. it means having pending jobs up the head that keep mounting and piling up that further lead to mental stress and the ultimately – no fruitition.
if one is prompt, she’s also tension free and she gets things DONE. ain’t that blissful?
now that i am employed and shoulder responsibility.. i shall endeavor (to the best of my efforts) to let go of the bondage or restraints… to be prompt..be a go-getter!
THAT is my resolution for this new year that beckons another new beginning! cheers.

bitter-sweet helplessness

you know, there comes a time in life when you’re quite close to realising what direction your life is headed. this generally comes after college -with a barrage of options lying ahead, a placement somewhere that happens by fate of luck , a chance meeting with some one at the right time right place … or in my case- it’s something that builds into your consciousness -watching your parent do it. my father was my inspiration to try my luck as a pilot in the air force. following in his footsteps sounded dreamy.

i remember the happiness when i cleared the written exam for the same – there was excitement. in hindsight, there wan’t that ‘passion’. keenness is one thing, passion another. all said, i found myself at the next level of rigorous testing. i’d fervently prepared, left no stone unturned. as a result, i made it! i was selected.

but an interesting thing happened. i failed the test for ‘flying’. the coveted job now rendered as the lost dream. with no second chances to try my luck again, i was shattered. had i failed as a child? i couldn’t cope up to my father’s standards. all the things about ‘surpassing’ my parents – came undone? i was in a difficult position. the former achievement didn’t seem like a success any more.

how could i have even consoled myself.  ‘never give up’ , ‘next time’ , ‘buck up’ cease to hold meaning when you fail at a ‘once in a lifetime attempt’. a bittersweet tide ebbed up in me today when i saw a beautiful sight of an aeroplane fly through the clouds, cutting across the sun’s reflection. it was a breathtaking view. i just stood watching at the beauty- helpless at what i couldn’t achieve. it’s funny how i can’t even console myself shunning these flying beauties – i’m a pilot’s Daughter!

*sigh*

but there’s something i know. there’s a passion today- passion to serve.  if i’m in the air force tomorrow, i shall never loose heart at not becoming one thing. perhaps it would be my absence of complacency and that would keep me motivated to excel! after all, there’s another thing i’ve learnt from my father- to “surpass” standards .

 

film review- Bhaag Milka Bhaag

what an inspirational piece of art! it’s the masterpieces like these that earn the industry of ‘entertainment’ a good name.raising the standards manifold.

the film is a biopic on the life of Indian Sports legend- Milkha Singh. it traces his journey from an ordinary man with expectations of earning a decent living as an Army man to one that gets him the coveted title of the ‘flying Sikh’.

his life path (of joining the Army) is not only a materialization of his childhood aspirations but is actually a step in direction of his destiny as a world class athlete. all of it which seemingly begins as a gateway to enjoy the few perks an Army recruit can afford- a glass full of milk being reason enough for Milkha.

only later to be revealed in the depth of his roots- there’s a traumatic loss of his homeland and his family to the brutalities of the ’47 partition. the one he narrowly survives as a kid but is suppressed enough for long to cost him the Olympic Gold (’60) . this agony that he carries for many years in his life – the anguish and the scar from childhood resurfaces everytime he hears the fateful words- ‘bhaag Milkha bhaag’.

these words are his weakness; symbolic of the internal conflict he battles within a happy go lucky persona. the story is about this mental ordeal of our protagonist that ends when Milkha finds himself on the other side of the border- knelt down and wept his heart out on the very land that was once his home. ‘circumstances are bad, not people’ , pacifies his long lost friend from the good old times, times burdened under the devastating setback. (but it’s almost like time stood still all this while- the reunion of the friends separated by borders is heartwarming. this friend has framed Milkha on his wall).

the fabric portraying the rise of the man- destined to be iconic, is the multifarious canvas of -Sport. milkha’s sport- Running.

the depiction of the narrative through the devotion, unwavering focus and the aweinspiring preparation to beat the world record is a class act! one that leaves you speechless. the screen seems small to capture the devout motivation towards the accomplishment of the goal. it moved a part of me.

yes. the man tastes the fruit of the rigorous training- creating history and making a record of his own. and true to a biopic, the protagonist isn’t made into a ‘hero’. after you win some you loose some. every race can not be won. in everyday life we battle with our internal conflicts. some latent ,some destructive. what matters is where you face them and when you defeat THEM. and no body else but the self can conquer these demons. like Milkha exemplified.

if life is a race, Milkha is a winner.

PS- Farhan Akhtar is the ultimate Milkha on screen. THA BEST!

dilemma#2. awakening

a new chapter of life had begun.. i found myself living the dream i had envisioned myself in. college! delhi university. i was going bonkers trying to make the transition from a schoolkid to a happening college goer! and what follows with it- makeovers- of both- self and wardrobe. handbags and shoes preoccupied my time and my mum my companion for the same. dreamy isn’t it. yes, because i failed to take cognizance of the raison d e’tre  of my presence there.

while i effortlessly managed to get the ‘miss in vogue’ attention but try as much as i did i had not made a successful transition in my attitude towards life. the realization of this purposelessness came as a rude shock after a poor academic score at the end of my college first year. perhaps i got to eat the sweet fruit without having to work towards it and hence didn’t realize the importance of the coveted seat i occupied. life had come full circle and my college happiness so far seemed an ephemeral mirage. more than my parents, more than my dear uncle and aunt’s dis approvals, more than any college mentor’s remarks – my inner self was wounded afresh with the plunged self confidence. i was crying again. as serves right to one escapist. i had lost faith in my ability to carry on any further in this new subject that i had ‘blundered’ to pursue. to the extent that i seriously considered switching to another ‘easier’ subject to get rid of economics once and for all.

reminiscing my escapism i exclaim at my irresoluteness. i wonder where i’d be today had my mum not shown me the mirror at face value! the reflection i saw couldn’t cut any bit over a sorry figure. that moment was momentous. thereon i knew it was time for me to anchor my adrift life boat. at this time i took up running- as a resort to take out my agony on the road. soon i became an avid runner and found peace in it.

persistence found me or i discovered it. i was cautious and deep inside worried if my efforts would bare fruit. indeed they did! i scored a massive improvement at the end of my second year of college- i had gone from a 53% to 67% and i was elated with the feeling.

in the final year of college my parents had shifted out of town- away from home away from my pillars of support i found myself in a hostel. this was the place i rediscovered myself again. my perspective towards many a things changed. i really missed my parents. this was the time i realized the worth of the values they’d raised me with. i became a better person. nevertheless i doubted my academic credentials still. this was my final year at college- the last chance to prove myself.

awesome times were spent at the place- each moment most memorable. gem of friends and hostel fun and parties. all only worked in favor of my resolve to deliver an encore of my last year’s performance. i tried being confident of my ability, but deep inside uncertainty troubled me. i wrote each exam with devout sincerity. later i would engage myself in calculating the odds of a good score to pacify myself. all of this attained gigantic heights before result time.

the judgement time approached us and my parents were back in town. what i saw in my score card brought tears of joy in my parents’ eyes. i had scored a whopping 70% !!

with a performance so impressive i had undone the blot of the 1st year but the lesson that the year tought me- due to which i saved myself- is precious. it stands testimony to the adage- everything happens for the best. i have regained my lost self confidence. i am convinced that ‘I can’ as long as i never give up!